Monday, July 31, 2017


I hollered "Help, Jared! Help! Help, Jared! Help!" My right hand in the wire deer fence. I was briefly helpless as hundreds of pounds of machinery cinched me there. I demanded my freedom.

By the time Jared sprinted across the field, I had freed myself from my stupid mistake. the mower was still hung up. Beren raced up shortly. Both of them offered their care.

I was stunned and yet I wanted to continue mowing the trails. I thought, "Arnica. This is really an Arnica picture." 

Jared offered to wrestle the machine out of Stuck City or to take me to the house and attend to me. "Looks bad, but I think you will be ok. Just let me know what you want me to do," is what I think he said.

When Beren raced back away, assured I was ok, I cried. Stupid mistake. Could be so costly. Could have really gotten hurt. Was glad I wasn't alone. Was relieved Jared wasn't using the trimmer and could hear me. Wondered who would hear me if I was alone. Wanted Jared to promise he would never use this machine alone. I just was sick of the Japanese stiltgrass and wanted a trail.

Jared hugged me gently. Once I gulped back the tears, he wrangled the mower up field. "Head inside. Take care of yourself," Jared softly said.

On the way back, Beren was crouched by the pond. He had a tiny bit of scarlet red Cardinal Flower pressed to his finger. I knelt beside him, curious. "I have this for this little cut," he said showing me a small, reddish scratch.

"I am going inside to get Aconitum for the shock of getting hurt," I said. "I'll get you some plants," he told me as he reached up and plucked a single yellow sunflower ray. He applied it to my hand. 

"I'll get you some Anise Hyssop. That will cool it off," he added. He put a Jewelweed leaf on top of that. My hand felt better, and a flush of life and pain came into my hand. "It feels better," I said.

He helped me get my gloves on with the herbs still in place. I turned the machine back on, and mowed for hours more. Many of my steps were accompanied by thoughts of injury, mistakes, and accidents.

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

"Some f*ck up"

What just happened in my check book? How did it go from $200 off to $938.01 off to several dollar amounts off in between?

I finally balanced the checkbook. A happy bonus is that I magically (and actually) resolved what I had penciled in last month's ledger as "some f*ck up".

It was just a few dollars. I had adjusted the amount, making the account balanced. I then scribbled "ok", which means that this pain in the *ss thing balanced.

Although I heard my parents (Hi, Mom, I know you are reading this) in the background telling me I ought to figure it out, I decided less than $5 did not need to cause me mathematical distress. Therefore, I attributed the unbalanced checkbook to "some f*ck up", which fits in between "an act of God" and "self-imposed calm-the-hell-down".

Anyway, "some f*ck up" was balanced because of another greater "some f*ck up". Sometimes two wrongs correct "some f*ck up".

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

The dog ate my writing

Damn it, just wrote something and google or the ipad ate it.